So, today.Monday. Definitely Monday. Not so definitely St. Patty's Day, though I hope you all enjoy the holiday and hopefully with a little more boozing than I did (but I think enough of that happened Saturday....)
It was a frustrating day. None of my classes seemed...worthwhile, I guess. I was very honest with people today though -- particularly professors. It seemed appreciated though.
Rehearsal was almost a waste, I was in there for a half an hour. We found a shirt for my character, so that was good. And I expressed how I wished there was more for me to "play with" to the director, and he did a little bit to help me out with that.
So I've been thinking about this list of things I want and need in a boy. How impossible is the list? It's pretty awful, but here's what I've narrowed down to specifically the "need" aspects:
- Must be attractive.
- Must love being paid attention to.
- Must allow me to take care of them a little bit, but still be able to take care of me should I ever need it.
- Must be able to put a smile on my face even when I'm being moody.
- Must not be as much of a jealous asshole as I am.
- Must know how to calm my jealousy. (Which, ps, isn't that hard if you know what to say. A guy could easily learn this if they asked. It's all one sentence, and it doesn't have the Big L Word in it at all.)
- Must love to take me to social events with his friends, or at least introduce me to them. (Make me feel like a trophy boyfriend sometimes, y'know?)
- Must love to be taken to social events with my friends or at least be introduced to them.
- Must be encouraging about my attempts to take care of myself, but not afraid to recognize when something I'm doing should not be encouraged and to say so.
- Must have a sense of humor.
- Must have a flare for living life, not just getting through it.
- Must have a strong personality.
- The most important one, hardest to find: Must tell me when I screw up!! Tell me when I'm overbearing, tell me if I'm annoying, tell me if I do something they don't like because either I can and will fix it, or we'll work around it, or it will be a deal breaker but at least there won't be any question of why things ended!
(Random Ethan Reynolds pic courtesy of his Myspace. It's beautiful, he's wearing a vest, he's beautiful. It just needed to be here. :P)
6 comments:
This is a good start. You've got stuff that balances your personality, which is very good and attractiveness and that is good too. How about health? E.G.: Are smokers out? Most important is that they care for you above all others and how about caring for you above their profession (like if he was a physician)? Is that important too? I would move sense of humor up in the list. How about a soul mate though I guess for one to meet your list, he would have to be. Just some thoughts. So far so good.
OK I am going to put my virtual foot down..."STOMP" giggle
Please Please don't set your expectations too high or that special someone will remain elusive for a long time to come...Sometimes we have to settle for a little less in order to gain more...It may not make much sense but when it comes to meeting that one person to Love throughout a lifetime, there has to be some give and take...Right now your list is fairly well balanced...I am a little concerned with the Jelousy part sweetheart...It can be very damaging to both parties...If it is a concern, find what it is that makes you jelous and tackle it head on...We all get a little insecure at times but we don't want this complicating something that should not be messy to begin with!
OK said my bit now keep that list appealing to both you and that special someone OK...
hugs
Shaney, you're all concerned about this jealousy thing but like I said it isn't hard to calm me down if I were to get jealous, because the only reason I get jealous is if I'm getting mixed signals and don't know where I stand with someone. And while, yes, I've found that that's what makes me jealous, but as far tackling that head on...not really something you can tackle by yourself, is it?
Sue, as far as health goes, there are things that I want, sure, but there's nothing under that category that I need. I'd love to have someone in perfect health who doesn't smoke or drink or do drugs, but I realize the chances of that happening are roughly 0.00000001%, y'know? :P I don't mind smokers as long as they don't reek of cigarettes all the time.
And, yes, if the list was in order, sense of humor would be highest. It's not exactly in order though. It's *almost* in order. :P
G,
Do not ever let anyone tell you otherwise, jealousy IMO is not a bad thing. Perhaps the problem is if and how we express it. Do you follow me? I get jealous all the time, but I choose to say it only when it is worth saying it. My BF sorts of knows... I am like you, I get jealous fairly easily... The older I am, the better I know how to handle it... But you are right, if you are not in a secure relationship, it is easier to get jealous...
As far as your list goes, I think that you should scratch out #1. Find out what you are not attracted to (Physically, i.e. Chubby guys, hairy guys LOL) and go from there... I found that opening my attraction zone a bit, helped me in finding someone that was more emotionally compatible with me... And just keep your hopes up, keep dating, and open your heart to the possibilities :) I am sure you will get there soon (to stage #2)....
ReefPicker
Reefpicker, scratching out number one would be fine if I was less shallow. I'm not, and I'm content with that. I've dated outside my realm of attraction before, and I've come to realize that there is no hope for those relationships.
But I totally agree with what you're saying about jealousy. When I'm in a solid relationship, I have no jealousy issues at all. Even if I know for sure that the guy is just keeping his options open or something like that, I'm okay, just as long as his attraction to and interest in me is a solid, confirmed thing.
"The most important one, hardest to find: Must tell me when I screw up!! Tell me when I'm overbearing, tell me if I'm annoying, tell me if I do something they don't like because either I can and will fix it, or we'll work around it, or it will be a deal breaker but at least there won't be any question of why things ended!"
This one....Billy didn't have.
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