"Sex on the Beach?" "Anytime, baby!"

Some other random stuff to talk about....

Monday night I went to Energy when I didn't have to work at Dark Lady and first thing I see? Two girls I went to high school with!!! We chatted a little bit, got caught up...I'm so different now from when I was in high school. I used to be nerdy, definitely not-so-much with the hotness, a total prude, and more than anything I was a people pleaser. I mean, I was so intent on doing what everyone expected of me that I didn't even realize I liked boys. Duh, much?

And now look at me. I'm like the total opposite -- though I'm definitely more me. And people like me better. Let that be a lesson to you. Those Above The Influence commercials are actually kind of on to something. :-P

Actually, Topher knows somebody I briefly went to high school with too, came by Dark Lady while I was working one night. It's always interesting because there's a "What the fuck??" moment. And of course they're always like "I remember when you were 'straight'!" Which, yes, I remember when I was "straight" too, kay, thanks. :-P

Anyways, the girls were mildly shocked when the exchange that's the title of this post took place. :-P

On a completely seperate and very much shallow note: I hate clothes this season. I was forced to buy some stuff from A&F a week or so ago to fit in with this season's key look. The clothes are so blah, and I usually like at least some of the stuff. This season, there's nothing.
Then the other day, I was at the mall and I poked my head into the Gap. Hated it all. Looked in American Eagle and I liked one pair of jeans. I never really like what they sell at PacSun, but it was no worse than anywhere else. Hollister was full of crap (but it usually is). I went into Guess...and I loved everything.
Unfortunately, I can't afford anything there. But if I had money.....ooooooooh!!! I loved it!

And here's the "It" Girl gossip from my point of view....
Now, ya'll know I looooove Lindsay Lohan. But dear God I hope she gets jail time. It might be the only way to get her the help she needs to live until I make it to Hollywood.
Britney Spears...I used to hope for a comeback from her, but it just seems like she is too far gone.
Paris Hilton....is a lying skanky hobag. She hasn't changed since jail. Who's shocked? Nobody.
Nicole Richie, darling, my second favorite....why have I not heard anything about you lately??? And why have I not heard more about the medical problem doctors were investigating, that was preventing you from gaining weight? (And before the skeptics jump in and say that problem was anorexia or cocaine or something, I'd like to point out that there are other medical problems that can prevent someone from gaining weight. Point in case, mine. So shove it.)
Lance Bass....are you kidding me? How does he get such hot boys??? Oh, right, famous.

Central PA Pride is this weekend. Unfortunately, I won't be there. But it sounds like it's going to be amazing, I so wish I could. Club XS is kicking the weekend off with a drag show featuring all the best drag queens from Baltimore, so that's hot.
The next morning there's the parade (and the protesters!!) and then there's the festival. There's a stage for all the drag kings and queens. This year they are actually bringing in some headliners -- Frenchie Davis for one!. Then, of course, Stallions is having a wild party. But Club XS is too -- and they're having DJ Seth Gold for theirs.
Agh, I wanna be there!! Alas, I can not.

What a rip off!!

That's right.
You came here expecting to see a hot guy and have me pontificate about him.
And I'm not delivering, even though I am posting.

I swear, this is a one time deal, but I wanted to pontificate about something else. Gorgeous, some would say, but not why I'm talking about them: Hollywood "It" Girls.

I really just want to discuss this theory I have.
See, I was thinking about all of the fag hags, fairy princesses, fairy queens, fairy godmother, queer dears, fag honeys, homo bros, fruit flies, fairy collectors, whatever you want to call them, that I've met. And it occurred to me, the Hollywood "It" Girls sort of have a similar personality.

DISCLAIMER: The following is loaded with stereotypes and generalizations. Don't hate me, I'm just a young and impressionable teenager. For nine more days.

Now, before Jenny and Grace and Sue start getting all offended...don't.
What I mean is the usual personality is this: they're are able to equal and sometimes surpass their gays in fabulosity and in bitchiness. Usually incredibly outgoing and ridiculously social. They can be extremely attention-seeking, much like the stereotypical gay man but they love the attention from gay men. Part of the reason for this, I think, is because gays can be so critical. Y'know...
"How's my hair?" "Honey, it's....no."
Or, if it's a nicer gay...
"How's my hair?" "It's not bad. Let's go fix it."
Or a less-nice gay...
"How's my hair?" "It's great...if you're a rat looking for a place to live."

Now, take a look at the Hollywood "It" Girls. Fabulous? Yes, if a bit trashy sometimes (but we'll get to that). Bitchy? Hell yes. Outgoing? Incredibly so. Ridiculously social? Check. Attention seekers? Bingo.
They have many of the same personality traits -- so why are they so much worse than any of my amazing fruit flies?
No gays.
When was the last time we heard about Paris Hilton going to a gay bar or hanging out with her gay best friend (GBF)? Never! I swear, she does not have a GBF! (Travesty, right?)

With no way of getting that critical kind of attention from her main gays, she (and others like her) are forced to get it in other ways. By making trashy mistakes -- showing your firecrotch in public, for instance. Making bad decisions -- even DUI. The media gives them their criticisms. The fans give them their criticisms. And as much as they say the negative attention hurts their feelings -- and it probably does -- the fact is they keep making mistakes. Why? Because they need that attention, and they need it to keep coming. If they are well-behaved, it goes away.

So, the key to classing up this younger generation of Hollywood socialites is to get them some GBFs who can tell them their hair sucks and their clothes are too tight or they need to wear underwear with that skirt, and who can take them out to gay bars and help them to do the fairy princess activities that these "It" Girls clearly need to do.

I claim Lindsay Lohan as soon as she's out of rehab again.